thoughts and thoughts of mine...

thoughts and thoughts of mine...............tmr will be my last OJT. after that the rest of the flight have to be solo.....which is so scary n stressful. been thinking that after 1 n a half year i wan to leave this idiotic place. the culture n environment really drive a person crazy. i just dun get it why are they so crude,rude and brainless.....why do they enjoy making pple's day a bad one n they will feel satisfactory...really wonders are all those pple there pervert or mad ......hooo.... this is only place that i can pen down everything..... life in there really sux but how i dun like to study after 1 and a half year where am i heading to ? going back to M1? its dumb. anyway enough abt wrk....its not clear yet...i met him. things were a bit like b4 but feelings slightly different... argh i just dunno wad am i doing also. he is going to get married i DO NOT EVER HAVE CHANCE. I know but i still hang on . do i really can't lie w/o him? no i can but i just dun wish to get him out of my mind. i really love him cos i did ask myself if he is really dying dun talk abt family commitment now if just saying he is dying i think i will hope to give anything and everything that i can to make him live. but i am sure he doesn't feel this way. wadever when i say things are like b4 .... but he did not call me today. shit him. i gotta stop tmr just hope i will have a gd day tmr.